It’s my favourite time of the year again! Another of my year on this planet comes to a closure, and I am still struggling to decipher the meaning of my existence in this universe.
I sit on the broken chair of my hostel room today, trying to recollect the events from my life that stood out from the rest so. If one fine day I ever taste some substantial amount of success, I would like to write an autobiography and fill it up with all the wackiest and crazy stuffs I have ever done. As the guy on the $100 bill would say, “Either write something worth reading or do something worth writing”. Right here right now I attempt to do both!
Blogdosts, this post today is an attempt to spill the beans. An insight into my world.
Before I proceed any further I have a few instructions for the readers:
I. This blogpost is strictly for all homo-sapiens except my mom! So mom if you
are reading this please forgive me…
II. All those gossipers out there, remember,
“what happens on my page, stays on my page!”
Time has come when he breaks the shackles and gets out of the skin or fur, whatever a penguin is supposed to have!
OK here it goes, five of the many crazy stories with me in the lead role!
5. Loot gayi Izzat in Pizza’t:
This tale goes back many many years, but every time I think about it, the guilt of embarrassment fills my mind. Well I was small, as small as I would love to play in one of these!
Place: Chennai.
Me, one of my Chess buddy had a visit to the nearby Pizza Hut. After a strenuous chess session this was a kick-ass way to regulate the stress hormones. They had one of this amazing ball pools and within no time me and my pal plunged into the ballroom.
A few minutes into our play, the store manager gave orders to vacate the pool. What the hell mate? We aren't done! (Don’t be a pervert, its not the way it sounds!)
Apparently we were 6 years too old to be have a swim. 10-15 customers in the house, the kids staring at us, clearly we were the elephant in the room! Wonder what they were thinking about us..
‘how many glasses of complan do these two kids drink each day.
Mommy I want my complan dose to be doubled with immediate effect! I wanna be as tall as those two 10 year olds in the pool!’
The guy with the tie, mumbled a few life lessons and all that we could do was hold our heads down and say.
“Seri Seri Sir, Seri Seri!”
4. ‘Well Done’ Inversion:
Time: 3.30pm. Place: Coaching centre, Chemistry class.
Yawn Yawn…
As much as I love Organic Chemistry; I have always maintained that a gloomy cloudy afternoon is not the best time to express your love!
The teacher with no clue of my mood continued with his daily chores.
‘Substitution Nuclear Reactions’, written in dark bold letters on the board. Yawn Yawn…(2 yawns in two minutes..boy I was on fire! Hope that’s not the case with the reader too :P )
The spatial arrangement of the product molecule gets inverted relative to the reactant, commonly known as the umbrella effect or ‘Walden Inversion’.
And then it struck me. There is this someone in a class of around 100 students who has worn his t-shirt inside out! Crystal clear, no printed design, the stiches and the threads clearly visible…
A one look by any student any the news would spread like a chain reaction. From your best friends, to the bullies and even the chicks!
My heart started playing double base, from dhak…dhak to dhak dhak…dhak dhak..the sound so loud that overpowered my lethargy.
Keep a low profile, everything will be just fine I consoled myself.
“Any answers, Shubham?” the sir asked. ‘No sir not today, I have bigger issues to worry about then your petty questions!
30 minutes for the break, and my reputation at stake. Boy I wish I could go underground for a few a while! The clock struck four. With no restrooms nearby, I had to make a decision. Either risk it out for another 90 minutes by staying in the class or to go out in the open flash your flabs to the pedestrians and restore the damage done. I chose the latter. Period.
What happened next is best if kept a secret.
All said and done, it was an inversion “Well-done”!
3. Hit me if you can!
Well this time I was sick. Sick of the monotonous daily routine. I needed the adrenaline rush. Something to make things more worth while!
On a dark desert highway,
Cool wind in my hair,
Warm smell of colitis (yup 5th block was near by)
Rising through the air,
Up ahead in the distance,
I saw a shimmering light,
My head grew heavy and my sight grew dimmer,
Place: National Highway 17 Time: after dinner.
Three guys were on their way after a heavy dinner (food only ;)) at Sai Bhavani. One of them was still unsatisfied. Nothing seemed interesting to him at that time. Bored of tv series, no distant holidays to have a trip home and the frantic classes to make things worse.
There are these times when your friends stereotype you with a certain tag which they keep bragging about for eternity. Only way to stop the trend, cut loose, prove them wrong…
And then I did it...
To know what happened next and to check out the top two slots in my all time crazy deed list, tune in to your very own Pingu’s page
Till then adieus amigos!
To be continued…
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